The day you went away

Did I ever wonder that one day you will leave me alone in this world? Yes I did, because our age difference has already warned me since the beginning of our relationship and hence we decided to be together I knew this day will come, I only never thought that it would be so fast.. One year ago today we just flew back from Our Tunisian trip, and we were planned our next trip. You are alive and full of energy and spirit.

Today I stand here on the train platform where we often stand together, where we always start our trips here, but now I am here alone without you. I need time to heal the loss in me, I know it is reality and I learn to accept it and look forward to living in this world on my own. However sometimes I do miss you a lot.

I miss the way you smile, the way you made me angry, the cuddle on the bed before sleep, your naggy lifestyle and how you want it all always tidy at home, I even miss the moment we fight and argue. Our house is so silent now without your music box, and I don’t wanna turn it on because I’m afraid I’ll be logging into you more.

There were no more voices that asked me to tell the story after office hour, no one picked me up  from the office anymore or prepared my lunch before I went to the office. Without my awareness you spoiled me the whole time but at the same time you have taught me how to be strong so I can stand on my own, also when you are not more around.

Our memories are the most valuable I have now, no one can take them away, I’m glad that we always fulfill your dream, each of our trips all over the world is part of your dreams come true, so I know you don’t have any regrets in this world, you have seen what you wanna seen, you live the life you wish for and turn back your head you can say you have a good life, and I’m happy for it.

You ever told me if one day you go first, I have to be brave to live on and go forward with a happy life, a life that is full of smiles and happiness. Never say never because no one knows what is ahead of us, you said you also decided never again in any relationship, till you met me that year. A curious fingertips that ended as we got together one day.

Many said you are lucky to have a young wife but I wanna say I am lucky to ever have you in my life, the love you show and gave me, is a gift that lasts forever, no one can ever take them away.  You show me the other side of me that I didn’t even know existed, you directed me how to grow strong and confidence to face the world, your love that protected me and gave me a secure feeling. You will always be part of my life till the day we might meet again in another part of the universe. And i knew i had found my soulmates in you

I love you and will always be…